Chicago Bound!

We are officially Chicago bound!

As of this summer the Little family will be packing our bags and moving to Chicago's North Shore where Jason will be working as an Associate Pastor at Grace Presbyterian of the North Shore (http://www.gracenorthshore.org/). We are excited and extremely thankful for this amazing opportunity to serve in this city and are looking forward to the adventures ahead.

And, in other news, our house is officially SOLD, contracts signed, title handed over, and Jason breathing a sigh of relief.  We will be able to rent it from its new owner for the month of June which will give us time to let the girls finish out school, pack our bags, enjoy some vacation with both sides of our families, and share some precious days with our friends in Portland.  So, there you have it.  From the East side of the Willamette River to the North Shore suburb of Wilmette, the Little Family is still in the Big City.

All Clogged Up

Tonight Eleanor crawled in my lap and said, "Mommy, can you not go out of town and away anymore?."
"Why, peanut?"
"Well, because I'm all clogged up," Eleanor said.
"What do you mean all clogged up?."
"I'm all clogged up with love for you.  I had lots of love for other people I was with but my love for you was stuck inside, and it got all clogged up.  Now it all has to gush out and I need to cuddle you a lot to let it out."
"I think we can arrange that babe." (sniff. tear. sniff...Ok, this mommy gig ain't all bad)

Mt St Helens

Yesterday, May 18th, marked the thirtieth anniversary of the day Mt. St. Helens blew off its top to spew fiery dust on the Pacific Northwest.  Thirty years ago the skies over Portland filled with smoke and debris as a snowy glacier forever changed its shape. Today, on a clear day my girls can identify Mt. St. Helens as the mountain “whose ice cream fell off the cone.”  The distinct flat top of St. Helens distinguishes it from the proximate Mt. Hood or the more distant Mt. Rainier.  

Lately, my emotions have been a bit fiery as well, clouding the skies of my heart and mind and at some inopportune times erupting on those around me.  Life is changing for the Little family.  To sum it up for those whom I have not already wearied with our story, we are leaving Portland.  A few weeks ago Jason and Pat came to the conclusion that HOPE (our church) cannot continue to support two families for the long term.  They made the painful and hard decision that it was time, for the long term viability of HOPE, for Jason to begin to think about leaving.  While financial support is available for Jason for up to another year,  wisdom deemed it necessary to begin the sometimes long journey toward finding other employment and selling a house.  The last few weeks have been stressful as Jason began working like mad to prepare our house to put on the market- cleaning out furniture, staging, painting basement floors, trim, and doors.  I began to feel like my life was slipping away from me a bit too quickly and that I was painfully out of control.  And then things only seemed to go faster.

To sum up the last ten days:

Sunday, May 9th- 

Jason and Pat announce to the congregation that our family is beginning the painful process of leaving within the year.

Tues, May 11th-

Our house goes on the market that morning...by afternoon an offer on our house for the full asking price-   unheard of in this downturning market (we are still in negotiations but things are looking hopeful)

Wed, May 12th-

Jason and I kiss our children goodbye leaving them with their Grammy while we board a plane to a major US city for Jason to interview for another job

Thur, May 13th- Monday, May 17th

Jason interviews with an amazing group of people and a loving head pastor desperate for help in a growing church. I am simultaneously filled with sadness that our time of church planting in this city I’ve come to love is ending and in complete awe at the kindness of this other church, the godliness of  its search committee, and the way God is providing for us.

Back in Portland today I was reflecting on the past week.  I finally took a deep breath and let it out after a week of intense emotion, change, and well, letting go.  Ultimately, we are not in control of the big things- a volcano explodes, an untimely death occurs, disease strikes unexpectedly, world tragedies- or the little things- job frustrations, life having the ‘rug pulled out from under us,’ hurts, and disappointments.  It is easy to feel “the cords of death entangling” (Psalm 18:4) us and to wonder if God is some distant tyrant like a Greek myth who is far away entertaining himself by playing with humans like chess pieces.  And yet, nothing is farther from the truth.  I read further into Psalm 18 this weekend as I “called upon the LORD: to my God I cried for help”(Psalm 18:6).  What struck me was the answer God gives to David.  He rescues him, he draws him out of the deep waters.  Why?  Because “he delighted in me” (Psalm 18:19).  God DELIGHTS in us.  Far from being distant He is closer than ever.  He came to us in human flesh to rescue us from ourselves.  He died for us.  He knows our struggles, our doubts, our hurts, our fears, and yet He reaches down and he DELIGHTS.  I am amazed at how quickly things are changing in our lives, and yet I am amazed too at God’s kind provision for us.  My heart is aching as I begin to let go and yet hopeful and even excited about the new adventures ahead.  

a bit of a blogging respite

Hello my family and friends that so kindly encourage me to keep this bit of internet self indulgence going.  I just thought I'd let you know that I am going to take a bit of a blogging respite for the next couple of weeks.  I will return by the end of May, and I will hopefully have some photos and words to share.  Thank you for loving us, supporting us, and for continuing to come back here to check in with us.  I'll post some more...after some time.

My Roanoke Visit

Since returning to Portland from my visit to Roanoke, VA last week,  I haven't had a chance to say thank you to all my wonderful aunties, uncles, mama, and cousins for an amazing few days with you.  For all your hugs, your listening ears, and the wonderfully delightful sense of place that I know with y'all, I am THANKFUL.  Thank you for being such a wonderful family and amazing people. I love you!

See that smiling woman standing in this old photo?  That is Tommie Whitman, a.k.a Granmama, who kept us smiling even to her graveside last week.  We couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day.  It was truly a celebration.  Thank you Brenda for all your service and love.  You are an amazing person and we are blessed to know you.  I hummed "You are my sunshine" halfway home.  God bless you, sister.

Below are some of my cousins- Sarah, me, and Leigh hanging at Clay's after the service and gearing up for a mean game of ....

Corn in the HOLE!  

(if you aren't familiar with this imbibing game of corn filled bean bags...call me, I wasn't either.  And yes, the name is a bit shady :), but it is super fun.  Jason's next commission- to build some for us.

*My aunt Clay gets all the credit for these pics. Thank you, Clay!  I didn't have my camera!